While eight flying reindeer are a hard pill to swallow, our Christmas story remains relatively simple. Santa lives with his wife in a remote polar village and spends one night a year traveling around the world. If you're bad, he leaves you coal. If you're good and live in America, he'll give you just about anything you want. We tell our children to be good and send them off to bed, where they lie awake, anticipating their great bounty. A Dutch parent has a decidedly hairier story to relate, telling his children, "Listen, you might want to pack a few of your things together before you go to bed. The former bishop from Turkey will be coming along with six to eight black men. They might put some candy in your shoes, they might stuff you in a sack and take you to Spain, or they might just pretend to kick you. We don't know for sure, but we want you to be prepared."
This is the reward for living in Holland.
The video below runs for 15 minutes, but you will find it passes quickly. It is amazing to me that the video begins and ends with blind people hunting with guns in Michigan, and in the middle moves on to Christmas in Holland. If you don't have time to listen to it today, please find time later. Listening to David Sedaris tell a story is the ultimate Christmas treat. Some of you may be getting actual presents from me for Christmas. For all of you, though, this is your real present. Merry Christmas.
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